Uh Oh.

Having realized with the events of the last post that maybe my moustache was too powerful to be wielded willy-nilly, I decided to cut back. A lot.


Oh yes. Erroll Flynn eat your heart out. Or John Waters, for those jealous bastards who want to be more disparaging.



I know, I know. Men want to be me, women want to be with me. Some will be a confused mix of both. Weak knees are normal and expected. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go back to my job where I teach children.

I Also Watched Venture Bros

Last night was a coworker's birthday party, so I did what any expat American with his head on straight would do. I got terrifyingly drunk and apparently made out with someone on a couch in the middle of the party.

Now I'm real hungover and super excited to see what drama will ensue. It'll be like getting shot in the gut with bullets made out of solid fun.

Oh, I also hung out with Ted from high school and it was nice. There are no pictures of any of this because my camera ran out of batteries at the very beginning of the night, which is probably for the best. Instead, here's a picture of a 14th century Korean star map, which I'm thinking of getting as a tattoo:



Stay classy, Internet.

And The Winner Is...

HEY GUYZ!!!



"Why, yes, I will be watching you while you sleep. Your children as well."



Maybe the wrong choice?

2010 Goatee Extravaganza!

Not much has been happening these last few weeks, but here's some highlights:

-I did the Portal song "Still Alive" at Open Mic. There is video of this, which I do not think I will be posting until it's possible to somehow convince people my bad playing is ironic. However, instead here's a picture of graffiti on the bathroom wall that led me to believe this song might have an appreciative audience:


You know what's awesome? A girl outside, waiting for her friend in the stall next to mine, asking aloud "Is someone taking pictures in the bathroom?" and then seeing me come out, tucking my camera into my pocket. Hi-Larious.

-My family visited for a few days. I had to wake up disgustingly early to hang out with them during the day before work, but it wasn't so bad. I got some new clothes.

-After being denied time off to spend with my family while they were visiting, I was instead given extra hours the following week. At the end of my 36-hour week, my boss gave me shit at work (on Saturday) for wearing jeans and I almost punched her in her stupid face. It's almost like she actively wants to destroy all the goodwill I had for her after she helped me out of the arrest fiasco. Fuck that cunt.

-Remember the MP3 player I was amazingly given back after a month of it being lost to the winds? Well, somehow it broke in my pocket. Dang.

-Drank a lot blah blah blah last night was a friend's birthday party, so there were a few interesting things. I tried my first Flaming Dr. Pepper (picture forthcoming, hopefully), then the birthday boy got shitty drunk and buried his face in cake right before hugging me and getting cake all over my jacket, while chanting Mickey Rourke's line "To all my friends!" from Barfly.


I'm not sure he was conscious at this point.

Anyways, stuff got pretty predictable from then on. One coworker started crying uncontrollably and then used my jacket sleeve to wipe her snot, another coworker propositioned me, and I spent the whole night thanking YHWH that drycleaning is so cheap in this country. Like, 3 bucks!



But let's get serious for a moment. There's been a conflict brewing on the horizon for about a month now, and I think we all know what it is.



What to do with this douchebag's facial hair.

I know there has been, diplomatically put, a mixed reception to the goatee. Well, here's where you folks can weigh in. Should I keep it? Go clean shaved? Shave the beard, keep the lip warmer? Lose the 'stache, keep the chin pubes?



THE DECISION IS YOURS.